All by myself

Ok not yet cause the kids are still sleeping but I will be. Today the hubby normally has off but he has a hunters safety class today and tomorrow. My brother in law and sister in law are going to it as well. I am dropping the kids off at school going shopping and then I will be up here all by myself for a few hours. Not that I mind in the physical sense. Its more that I am normally the one being left behind. Not that I have any interest in a hunters safety class either. Its also not that I never get to do what I want because I do. Its more the jealousy of the care free life others have with their kids. I am not green with jealousy or anything either. I just wish I could drop my kids off with grandma for the day and join the others. If we want to do something with the 4 of us adults it just cant happen. Either the hubby or I have to stay here. My brother and sister in-law both know how to take care of the kids at the basic levels. I am comfortable leaving them in their care but they are the only ones. My sister in law even knows when Ri is low by looking at her now. They have not experienced a grand mal from Quinten yet and I hope they never have too but I am confident they can handle it. Still there will be no the 4 of us going and doing something together. There will always be the odd man out and typically it is me. Partly because I dont have the same interests as them and I rather the hubby get out and enjoy the things the others do. I dont have the same need to get out of the house and do things as he does. I am content in my home with the kids and laptop lol. Would I love typical kids that liked to go camping and fishing? Sure its stuff I would love to do. Would I love for them to want to go on a walk with me? Very much so but any of those is like asking them to pull their own teeth out. Wait not a good example cause the boys would try that so they could get money from the tooth fairy. Its like asking them too sit still for 10 min. Its just something they can not do. I have accepted that and even in my round about way of complaining I am not. Like I said I am ok with them not wanting to do any of those things even tho I would like them to be able too. For me and for them, for our family. It would be great to just be able to get up and go as a family and do things or be able to hire a baby sitter to watch them. Heck to be able to leave them home alone. The boys will be 12 this year and Ri 11. I started babysitting at 11. I cant and they cant do that. It boggles my mind at how different they are from me at the same ages. I am glad on many many levels lol I was not always a good girl. Still it would be nice to have that more care free life others do with their kids its not in the cards for us and life is such.............

P.S. I am sure by now you are getting annoyed with the life is such at the end of each blog as am I. However I started it so now I feel like I have to add it at the end so deal with it ;)